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Yurei von Hortenberger

:S

Tue Apr 1, 2008, 7:40 AM
Well, I'm sure a few of you have been wondering where I've been.

Unfortunately I started taking a different medication for my depression, and one of the nasty side effects was apathy - I didn't even realize what it was doing to me for a few months until I sat down and actually analyzed exactly how I felt. A lot of the time I felt nothing about day-to-day things, and if someone had asked me what I wanted to do, or what I thought about something, my answer was 'I don't know'.

For those of you that don't know, apathy is insidious and nasty - it basically makes you not want to do anything. At all. Ever.

There were a lot of times where I read an email, or a note, sat there looking at it for a bit, and then just left it - I have no idea what was going through my head at the time. But if you've sent me a note or email and I haven't gotten back to you, I'm terribly sorry, but be assured, I'll do my best to reply by the end of the week. Better late than never, eh? Maybe. >__>;;

Once I realized what was going on, I was able to deal with it - to a certain extent. I'm not off the meds yet - you get uber withdrawl if you stop too quickly, but i'll be seeing my doctor real soon. :S

To those of you that have commented and faved lately, thanks a lot. I appreciate it, even if I forget to say thanks at the time. :)

xoxo
Jiko

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Aww hun -huggles- I hope you're doing better <3
Geez having apathy sounds on par with having depression >.<

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"The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time!"
hooooboy, I am familiar with apathy. It's awful. Once you get back to feeling more or less normal it's kind of horrifying that you endured so much time as something of an empty shell of your former self.

For me, I get apathy if I don't take meds. Sort of a recent development in the past year. It's so awful, even if I want to draw, and force pencil to paper, I can't make good lines come out.

I hope your doctor's able to switch you onto something better!

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www . sugarpencil . com
Glad to know you're all right. I was worried about you. :hug: Medication can be a two-way street. I was tempted to try it myself, but opted for a natural route.
And here I was thinking about getting medicine for my depression o.O;

I'm glad you're doing better though hun <33 Missed hearing from you =3

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He is the president of the free world, and I am Schmucky the clown.
-Lewis Black
Damn, that really sucks. -__-

Was beginning to worry because I haven't heard from you in aaages.

If you need to talk about anything I'm always available - I've gone through the whole depression meds thing, so I kinda know what you're talking about. >.o

Are you going to be at Poppy's 80th on Friday? I'm flying home from work that night so I'll be there, for a change. Would love to catch up after so long.

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"Inspiration Constipation" - when you can't write or draw stuff.

Kudos to Aludra for the Shaman avatar
Thanks chica, I'm doing much better - now that I know what it's doing, I can deal with it. :)

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"What makes a good man go neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?" - Zapp Brannigan
They actually have medication for that? I know what you mean about the drawing part, I had exactly the same problem - If I could manage to force myself to sit down with some paper, I'd end up getting up an hour later with either crappy scribbles, or nothing at all. :S

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"What makes a good man go neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?" - Zapp Brannigan
Yeah, some of the meds they put out are almost as bad as the illnessess. Maybe try St John's Wort, it does the same thing, but has very few side effects.

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"What makes a good man go neutral? Lust for gold? Power? Or were you just born with a heart full of neutrality?" - Zapp Brannigan
Sucks to hear that. :( Hope you're feeling better soon.

Apathy is an awful state to be in. I've been in a terrible depressed, apathetic funk for the last five or six months and it's affecting my Uni work and training. Not sure how to get out of it aside from biting the bullet and keep moving forward.

Take care.

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